Just a little tired

I’ll jump in here. Yeah, its been a bit. I spoke with one of the followers on here who said, you haven’t posted in a while. “Yeah, just been lazy”. No, I’ve actually been tired. Well, we’ve all been tired. Especially our heroine Elizabeth, who we thought would “be doing better” when she started chemo. Well, that was nonsense. There has been bad days and OK days. Mostly the nausea. The first couple of days after the chemo are fine, because they shoot her with anti-nausea meds. We actually went out to eat as a family last tuesday. I’m not sure I’ve ever been so happy to eat at The Loop but it was great. But around wednesday they wear off, and it just stinks. She went up to see her class on Friday. It was long overdue as every time she has tried we cursed it by saying “hey, she’ll be there (pick a day)”. Then Dwayne would rear his ugly head or something else would happen. But she muscled up and we headed there. I left her feeling a little queasy but a friend was picking her up and going to lunch afterwords. Well, that was short lived as immediately after she just went to her moms and was wiped out. The next two days were a wash. We sat in bed for a while saturday afternoon. Both of us, just tired. Tired of her feeling bad, tired of Dwayne, tired of just being in this situation. Just a little tired. That’s probably the reason I haven’t been on here. We hear it all the time, stay positive. I’ve written on here, think positive thoughts, ride the wave. But an old friend of mine whose mother just passed from cancer told me at the jump, you’re going to hit a lot of different feelings. I’m sure I’ll get back to nonsense on here. And I’m sorry for posting this little “woe is us”. And I’m sure everyone on here will say, don’t worry about it, you have the right to. But it sucks. And we’re tired. I called the doctors because at the beginning they said if you’re feeling bad from the chemo we can switch up the cocktails we’re giving you. I’m no doctor but I think that would be a great idea at this point. Because this doesn’t seem to work. They held off the radiation due to the fact she feels like ass. They’re waiting until she feels more healthy to withstand it. Again, I’m no doctor but it would seem if we keep down this road with the same stuff we’re going to keep feeling exactly the same. 
But, a little good news goes a long way. Ham got asked (and finally accepted) a date to the senior prom. She’s going with her oldest friend. When I say old, there’s pics of them together at maybe a year and a half old. They’ve been together in the same class through elementary and middle school and in theater in high school. She texted us the picture of his “promposal” poster he made and I wont lie, I teared up on a jobsite. Then I got home and her godfather (and one of my oldest and best friends) after hearing the story said, yeah, I’ll pick up her dress. So I teared up again but thankfully I had rum out back. Elizabeth and Ham went to pick it out today. A little good news goes a long way. 
Look guys, I’m going to cut this one short. And thanks for the bended ear. I’m going to go lay down beside my bride and take a quick nap. Then wake up and be grateful to do it again. Because like I said at the very beginning of this nonsense, it ain’t a sprint, its a marathon. Love you guys and blog at you later.
#uphillbattle

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